I hate the days that start off really weird.. Slept in til 11 which is very unusual for me.. then had an enourmous falling out with my gf over the most idiotic issue, weird.. Now because of it she thinks we might not work out in the long run, which is definitly weird. One fight and she doesnt feel the same way she did less than an hour ago.. Every couple argues and fights, it’s what makes you stronger and deepens your relationship.. The ones who dont fight are the ones who end up splitting up.. I know this is just her defensive response to the situation but it still hurts to hear her say things like that..


New Year, New Possibilities… Same Old Sh*t..

A Happy New Year to everyone.. Im sure im not the first and i know i definitly wont be the last to want to know what the hell women are really thinking.. My gf says we should get together tomorrow for lunch since im not gonna be able to spend a lot of time with her this week because of my work schedule; yet when i try to set up the time and the logistics of it she says,” no, its fine we dont need to do anything”.  Why the hell did she bring up the idea in the first place if she didnt really want to do it to begin with?.. i wish i knew, all it does is frustrate the hell out of me and make me wonder why she doesnt want to.. i know shes not cheating on me and that she never would, but why doesnt she want to go out and get lunch with me.. its like she resents being with me sometimes.. she doesnt realize that when she does things like this it really depresses me..

Another Day, Another Dollar…

Why is it that every year Christmas gets more and more stressful?.. WHats supposed to be a time of magic and wonder has turned into a time of people getting trampled and pepper-sprayed in stores.. Every year you need more money for gifts because everything gets more expensive.. My girlfriend is the most stressed i have ever seen her, but most of that is caused by her mother, and it makes me feel bad. I honestly don’t know if im going to have enough cash to buy presents for everyone. I though i was going to get a whole lot more hours at work during the holiday season but unfortunately we havent been as busy as they assumed we were going to be.. So the trade-off is everyone’s hours have been shaved a little bit, so instead of getting 95-100 hours a pay period im getting 85-90. Which doesn’t sound like a huge drop off but when you’re expecting the former its kind of a let down.. I havent even started my shopping yet, im a huge procrastinator.. We build up the holidays every year just to be burnt out and usually disappointed by the end of it.. I do enjoy the holidays when i have a significant other to share it with even if she is stressed out of her mind.. Working today from 10-7 will more than likely be a long day which wont be conducive to helping me get my shopping done.. Hopefully i can survive the next week and get ready to ring in 2012.. until then Happy Holidays!

Just another day…

Most people in this digital and globally connected age cant stand to be alone with their thoughts for more than a few seconds.. i differ in that respect, although being alone inside my head gets a little scary sometimes :/, i enjoy that quiet alone time to muddle through the mess insdie my mind and do a little “spring cleaning”.. It helps me decompress and figure out whats important to me at that very instant, which is always a nice thing to find at the end of the day.. Today what im figuring out is that my girlfriend is the most important thing to me right now.. sure we have our disagreements and our fights but no matter what i always feel the same way about her after.. spending time with her is the best part of my week.. what she said to me this morning got me thinking though, she said she felt like she was disappointing me because she had to go to work and leave me alone for most of the day. that is in no way a disappointment to me, im not saying im glad to not have her around, what i mean is i know she has to work and although ill miss her til she comes home it does let be alone with my thoughts for a while which is nothing she has to worry about.. its not like all-of-a-sudden my mind is going to yell, “You need to break up with her, shes no good for you”, it just makes me appreciate even more all the time we spend together.. i dont get mad at her for having a job and being a loyal and diligent worker by showing up for her shift when shes scheduled.. whether or not she feels the same way is unknown to me, but i would assume it is.. all i really do know is that i love her and would do anything to make her happy 🙂 .

Bored at Work…

The one down side of working at a sports store is the long periods of downtime between people coming in. You can only watch Sportscenter so many times before it becomes mind-numbingly redundant. Dont get me wrong i love my job and enjoy coming in to work everyday, just wish more customers could come in and hang around for a while because the greatest part of this job is debating sports with every die-hard fan that walks in. Im sure it doesnt help that its raining today and i work in an outdoor mall, but you’d figure with only two weeks til Christmas it would be a little busier. Maybe things will pick up later in the evening…

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